Pais it Forward

Raise your hand if you’ve ever felt personally victimized… by yourself

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As my mother would say, we are all victims of our childhood. I’m not saying she wasn’t right in some regard, but I do believe you are what you want to become.

What if we lost the victim mentality and stepped out from behind the curtain we have been using as a shield. It’s always easier to play a different character in life, a ‘better’ or ‘stronger’ version of our true selves. But why? Living an unauthentic lifestyle adds stress. Remove the stress and open up your life to all the possibilities of happiness. It’s really that easy.
You’re doubting this concept, I know. But what about the elements in life which bring stress of which we CANNOT control? You’re right. There are an abundant amount of things in life that won’t go our way. Things that will make us feel alone, confused, angry, victimized, you name it. We have all experienced these and painstakingly, we will again.
My new outlook in life is that whatever you’re encountering, well it’s super tiny in this massive universe so grab a good attitude and try to find the lesson. All hardships in life teach us something about ourselves it is up to us to find this and learn from it. If we chose to live in the victim mentality and think poor us, ignoring the lesson, well guess what – the lesson will have to come back at a later date.
Imagine all the stressors you’ve encountered just in the last week. Was it traffic? Was it an important meeting at work? Or perhaps having to have a difficult conversation with a loved one? Depending on your reaction, did that stressor carry over to any other part of your life? Most likely it did. And the chain reaction begins.
This topic of taking each experience in life as a lesson is top of mind for me as I recently was let go from my job. Was I angry? You’re damn right. Was I confused? I still am to be honest. In aiming to practice what I preach I told myself this is happening for a reason. You won’t know how the dust will settle, so don’t try to figure it out. Look beyond the event or action and ask yourself, what are the positives or the lessons I can take away? My responses to myself were:
  • I was in a job which I was complaining about more often than not. A hostile and volatile office environment was wearing on my energy. That’s gone so my energy can return!
  • The holidays are stressful for almost anyone with a pulse. I can use this time to try and do helpful things for others who don’t have the time or send gifts which I normally wouldn’t have time to put together to my favorite people.
  • I’ve been dreaming of giving my hobbies more attention but always find excuses. I’m working out daily, brewing beer, taking more photos and active in reading and writing on my blog.
  • Nearly everyone in this world has or has had a job at some point. I’m fairly certain this won’t be my last (although one week in and I am trying to find where this supposed money grows on trees to fulfill a full-time stay-at-home-career).
My words are not aiming to undermine anyone’s situations – we all go through once-in-a-lifetime events which are scarring and deserve the energy you will give to them. What I’m hoping this will help you do is take a moment to reflect when you feel anything but joy and content and ask yourself, how can I turn lemons into lemonade, or maybe lemon bars as it is the holidays 🙂

I’ll leave you with a little Christmas cheer

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